The 4th Interplanetary

http://freakangels.com/whitechapel/comments.php?DiscussionID=6078

This has to be the worst way to wake up after your stag night, tied up in your car, surrounded by empty beer cans and bomb desposal police
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8019243.stm

With any luck I'm right and something awful isn't about to happen.

World of Warcraft created the herpagonnhoraids
World of Warcraft causes famine
World of Warcraft locks you out of the car when there's a lion
Where World of Warcraft should have a chin, it has nothing.
World of Warcraft would encourage a memeber of the civil service to break into offices and steal documents
World of Warcraft exposes its genitals on the radio
World of Warcraft cancelled Firefly
World of Warcraft would cancel House if it could
World of Warcraft should be put down for the good of the species
World of Warcraft may not kill you, but neither does it make you stronger
World of Warcraft wants Sarah Palin to rule the world
World of Warcraft has already begun to destabilise the government
World of Warcraft is systematically deleting every copy of the Princess Bride
World of Warcraft created Jarjar and Midichlorians
World of Warcraft is not fond of owls
World of Warcraft is gonna give you up
World of Warcraft allows nulls in all fields
World of Warcraft is how Godwin started Nazi Germany
World of Warcraft rides a bicycle on the footpath, with no lights
World of Warcraft flooded venice
World of Warcraft did not make you a cookie
World of Warcraft popularised 'reality' TV
World of Warcraft had sex with your cat
World of Warcraft removes the last DVD from all your box sets
World of Warcraft puts chilli on your contacts
World of Warcraft breeds labradoodles
World of Warcraft ate your hamster
World of Warcraft writes a Guardian column
World of Warcraft elected Boris Johnson
World of Warcraft designed the Olympic London 2012 logo
World of Warcraft found that the cake was real, but ate it before you got there
World of Warcraft put a magnet in your tape collection back in the '80s
World of Warcraft buys you socks every Christmas
World of Warcraft prevents watched pots from boiling
World of Warcraft caused the economic crash
World of Warcraft huffs kittens
World of Warcraft tells you spoilers for everything you intend to watch
World of Warcraft messes up your hair while you sleep
World of Warcraft hate you longtime
World of Warcraft uses the last piece of toilet paper and does not replace the roll
World of Warcraft hides cheese at the back of the larder
World of Warcraft leaves the seat up
World of Warcraft is what suddenly causes the seat to fall while men urinate
World of Warcraft puts salt in the sugar jar
World of Warcraft gives you lupus
World of Warcraft hides the remote
World of Warcraft is taking the hobbits to Isengard
World of Warcraft sunk the Belgrano
World of Warcraft pronounces it 'Nucular'
World of Warcraft is keeping Cliff Richard alive
World of Warcraft gets erections on crowded trains
World of Warcraft is immanentising the eschaton
World of Warcraft puts your face in the nasty jar
World of Warcraft puts pointy things in your bed
World of Warcraft prevents development of Artificial Intelligence and Faster Than Light travel

Apparently I'm just stupid, lots of people think so. Well here's stupid me, if you'd rather not associate with stupid people then you'll have to fuck off because i'm not going anywhere.

I said:

Dear All,

It is with deep sadness that I read of your decision to bow to the narrow perspective of a few homophobes and withdraw an advertisement featuring a split second of affection between two men. I'm really not sure what could have motivated such a choice, given that the few hateful bigots genuinely concerned enough by such images as to boycott your good must be far outnumbered by the entire gay community plus all those heterosexuals who find discrimination deeply distasteful and who by now know that you have let us all down.

Are you aware tha the 1950s were, in fact, approximately fifty years ago?

I applaud the creatives at BBDO for such an enlightened and sweetly toned spot, and I think that my great uncle, Morris Drake, would be deeply disappointed by this abandonment of forward thinking advertising by the company for which he coined the phrase 'Beans Means Heinz'.

Yours


they said


Dear Joff

Thank you for your recent email regarding the Heinz UK commercial for Deli Mayo. Consumer feedback is very important to us and we appreciate the opportunity to respond.

Heinz pulled the ad in the UK because our consumer research showed that the ad failed in its attempt to be humorous and offended people on all sides.

Heinz apologises for its misplaced attempt at humour and we accept that this ad was not in accordance with our long-standing corporate policy of respecting everyone's rights and values.

Again, our sincere apology to anyone who felt offended. We appreciate you taking time to contact us to express your opinion and allowing us to address this issue.

Liz Pickstock
Consumer Contact Department


o_O
What?
The?
Fuck?


so I said

Dear Liz


I'm not entirely certain what this reply was supposed to achieve. I complained that you failed a huge portion of society, that you rolled over and allowed bigots to dictate the content of your advertising and force you to stop including vague homosexual imagery. you have replied with a stock response apologising for including vague homosexual imagery.

How exactly is apologising to me for offending hatemongers and homophobes going to help?

I'm now not only offended by your cowardly decision, I'm deeply offended by your total unwillingness to even hear my point of view. To send me a cut and paste template mail claiming that "Consumer feedback is very important to" you which makes it painfully obvious that my feedback meant so little you failed to even gather the gist of it is one of the most blase and arrogant mistakes in PR that I've witnessed for a considerable period..

Yours in increasing and obviously mutual contempt

(Stolen wholesale from foreverdirt)

Heinz said it had 200 complaints about a UK ad featuring two men kissing (chastely). You can see the ad and read the story here (Guardian).

I wrote my complaint to Consumer.Contact@uk.hjheinz.com , cc-ing in new.complaints@asa.org.uk (googling "mailto" taught me to do this!)


******************

I've written my complaint, maybe if more than 200 of us write in to get this fixed they'll see the error of their ways?

Saw Iron Man in my first serious excursion since the op. Stonking film, thoroughly enjoyable, wonderfully put together and surprisingly hard hitting in places without sacrificing any of its sense of fun. Not an easy feat at all.
Stay till after the credits if you see it.

Precisely two people have read and commented on my work in progress so far. The way my brain works I really do need cajoling and encouraging to continue, after all, if my mates won't read it for free there's now way a publisher is going to be able to get people who've never heard of me to pay for it.

Lastly, does anybody want a slightly worn GeForce 8600 GT 512 PCI-E graphics card for £20? On the understanding that the fan is slightly ropey and may need fixing or replacing at some point hence the less than half RRP price. Selling because i though it was dying so ordered a replacement, only to see a sudden improvement (ain't it always the way?).

The fuckers killed Bhutto.

( Read more... )

www.hellfiremedia.com is now live
Consume.

Ok guys, I'm getting a little nervous about this.
Have any of you printed one of these off and put it somewhere, or even shown it to someone?
I ask because at this stage, only three people have even mentioned the gig in their LJ (thank you flannelcat,  penguin_worship and my ever lovely oxfordgirl).
I have no professional promotion so I'm relying on you guys.
I'd be doing this myself if I could get to London any time before the gig, but I can't.
This could be almost as big a washout as Bromley.
Please help.

I hope some of you plan to make it :)

Also, i have a favour to ask of those of you who live in London, If each of you could print just a couple of copies each of this poster (click on it to get the full size version) and put them up somewhere where alternative types are likely to see (Camden, Holloway Road, alternative bars out in the boroughs, in or near colleges etc.) then I'd be eternally grateful.

Edit: Also if you could see your ways clear to propogating this all over LJ that would rock :)

(translation: if you really loved me, you'd post this in your journal)

I hope some of you plan to make it :)

Also, i have a favour to ask of those of you who live in London, If each of you could print just a couple of copies each of this poster (click on it to get the full size version) and put them up somewhere where alternative types are likely to see (Camden, Holloway Road, alternative bars out in the boroughs, in or near colleges etc.) then I'd be eternally grateful.

Edit: Also if you could see your ways clear to propogating this all over LJ that would rock :)

(translation: if you really loved me, you'd post this in your journal)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=476644&in_page_id=1770


EDIT:
What do people reckon: Would he go to prison if he was working class, that is to say if the £2000 fine wasn't pocket change to him anyway?

They want to tear down camden market and replace it with yet another Fucking Chavworld shopping centre, because there aren't enough of them yet.

let's all at least pretend we have a voice and ask them not to.

http://www.savecamdenstablesmarket.co.uk/

And invite mr Brown to show us that he's not the spectacular conservative he appears.

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/camdenmarket/

INTRUSION @ THE CELLAR FREWIN COURT (off cornmarket) OXFORD

onstage  at  9:00

INTRUSION @ THE CELLAR FREWIN COURT (off cornmarket) OXFORD

onstage  at  9:00



Come see me rock.

INTRUSION @ THE CELLAR FREWIN COURT (off cornmarket) OXFORD

onstage  at  9:00



Come see me rock.

Pick two or three of the words from the list below and name a character of yours and one of mine and I will write a short segment (drabble, paragraph, whatever) which features both your character and mine. Neither canonicity nor accuracy is guaranteed, and I may not do all of the requests if I can't think of something good. First come first served, each word to be used only once.

001. Beginnings. 002. Middles. 003. Ends. 004. Insides. 005. Outsides.
006. Hours. 007. Days. 008. Weeks. 009. Months. 010. Years.
011. Red. 012. Orange. 013. Yellow. 014. Green. 015. Blue.
016. Purple. 017. Brown. 018. Black. 019. White. 020. Colourless.
021. Friends. 022. Enemies. 023. Lovers. 024. Family. 025. Strangers.
026. Comrades. 027. Parents. 028. Children. 029. Birth. 030. Death.
031. Sunrise. 032. Sunset. 033. Too Much. 034. Not Enough. 035. Sixth Sense.
036. Smell. 037. Sound. 038. Touch. 039. Taste. 040. Sight.
041. Teacher. 042. Weaver. 043. Huntress. 044. Merchant. 045. Smith.
046. Star. 047. Heart. 048. Diamond. 049. Club. 050. Spade.
051. Water. 052. Fire. 053. Earth. 054. Air. 055. Spirit.
056. Breakfast. 057. Lunch. 058. Dinner. 059. Food. 060. Drink.
061. Winter. 062. Spring. 063. Summer. 064. Autumn. 065. Sharks.
066. Rain. 067. Snow. 068. Lightning. 069. Thunder. 070. Storm.
071. Broken. 072. Fixed. 073. Light. 074. Dark. 075. Shade.
076. Who? 077. What? 078. Where? 079. When? 080. Why?
081. Coyote. 082. Ant. 083. Serpent. 084. Jaguar. 085. Basilisk.
086. Choices. 087. Life. 088. Lesson. 089. Work. 090. Home.
091. Equinox. 092. Solstice. 093. Tomorrow. 094. Yesterday. 095. Birthday.
096. Alternative 097. Luck. 098. Gamble 099. Past. 100. Future.

Ladies, Gentlemen and assorted others, you are invited to The Balcony , Jean Genet's seditious play, banned in the 1960s for scenes of sexual and political deviance, directed by Meg Jayanth.

'Outside: the revolution rages.

But inside this house of illusions we deny even death entrance; here you may die and live again, here we make death part of the evening's entertainments.

Amongst the mirrors and chandeliers of The Grand Balcony you may find consolation. Within these edifices the revolution does not exist. Forget the outside world, shed your skin and be whoever you want to be. Madame Irma and her girls are here to provide for you an evening of illusion and enchantment, at a most reasonable price.

Welcome to The Grand Balcony, straddled halfway between bordello and theatre. A show in which you are welcome to participate.

Everything can be as real or false as you desire.

Take the narrow road round the back, watch out for the snipers and let us entertain you while the city burns.'

Complete with gender-fuckery, gloomy brothel interiors and on-stage castration, this show also features a live performance from local band Sinflower. (me!)

Previews described The Balcony as 'a knockoff Sisters of Mercy Video.' High Praise! And you can see all of this Tomorrow till saturday, 7.30pm at the OFS with a 2.30 matinee on Saturday. It's selling fast, so book in advance: tickets are £8.50/£6.50 concessions, from the OFS theatre or via the website . In fact, just go to the website and look at the pretty pretty pictures.

PS: Tomorrow's performance, FYI, will finish in plenty of time for Intrusion!